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My Beutiful Cynthia is Gone

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    #1

    My Beutiful Cynthia is Gone

    Hi All - this will be my last post for awile. My partner of 20 years plus died the other day and am numb and in shock. I have not stopped crying yet, I don,t know if I ever will. she was my everything I don,t know what I am going to do. likely I will lose the house, which is ok because I cannot afford it and because Cynthia is everywhere. Her life lately was not worth a damn, althouth I did everything in my power. I was there when she passed, I felt her leave and then looked at the monitors and she was flatlined. I had to fax them her living will when she first went in which was the hardest thigs I have ever done. this akso contained a DNR so they keot her comfortable. I am considering moving but I know the best thing I can do is to wait a few months,no rash decisionsm She was one of the most loving,caring people I have ever known. Please Pray for her. I know I did everything I could. She had a living will and one of the hardest things I have ever done was to submit it - I do know she is is in a better place now and out of pain - the last 6 months were not kind to her so....... BTW I am still crying and hope I will stop sometime.
    Hope all is well with everyone.
    Blessings
    Alex44
    Skypilot
    Last edited by alex44; 06-16-2017, 05:47 PM.
    Tags: None
    #2
    Alex I am so sorry to read of the death of your partner. I will pray for her and for you.

    I think you are right about not making any big decisions for a few months.

    Blessings to you,
    ANN
    There comes a time when silence is betrayal.- MLK

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      #3
      I am so sorry for your loss. You must have been through a horrible time.

      It's probably no comfort to think of your Cynthia as being at peace now. You'd like to have her as she was, alive. This board is a mere shadow of its former self but those of us who are still here can hope that your good memories of her will be comforting as time passes.
      SPMS diagnosed 1980. Avonex 2001-2004. Copaxone 2006-2009. Glatopa (glatiramer acetate = Copaxone) 12/20 - 3/19/24.

      Comment

        #4

        ((((((Alex)))))) ~

        I am so very sorry for your loss of your beloved Cynthia.

        Having followed your love story and health struggles together over the past several years, I know how devastated you must be right now. Just as you finally became healthy, after conquering Hep C, Cynthia's health began to decline. I'm so sorry that she suffered.

        You took excellent care of Cynthia and did everything you could for her, including honoring her end of life wishes. I know how difficult that was for you, Alex.

        You are wise to give yourself some time, before you make any major decisions.

        May you find comfort in knowing that Cynthia is at peace now, in bliss, free of her physical vessel. She will always remain near you, as her spirit and light shine on. One day you will be reunited.

        God be with you and grant you strength.

        You are in my prayers ~



        Love & Light,

        Rose
        Mom to Jon, 49, & Michael, 32, born with an undiagnosed progressive neuromuscular disease. Angel Michael received his wings in 2003. Angel Jon received his wings in 2019. In 2020, Jim, their Dad, joined them.

        Comment

          #5
          alex ...

          i am sorry to read about the death of your loving cynthia.

          i have been reading your posts for years because you are such a caring person here and because i like to keep up with our small forum family that still post here.

          i know you and cynthia haven't been doing well for quite a while, yet even though you haven't been well yourself, you were taking care of cynthia because she was very sick and that's the type of person you are. i'm sure cynthia appreciated your support and care the last months of her life. yes, she is in a better place and life goes on. you will never forget her.

          take care of yourself, alex. i hope your condition was cured by the drugs you were taking for so long and i hope your health improves in the future.

          (((((hugs))))),
          jeannie
          WE ARE BT!
          "The world is a better place when you're barefoot." Mark
          "Don't go there unless you know the way back." TC
          "...there will be an answer. Let it be." Paul McCartney

          Comment

            #6
            Alex I can't imagine what you are going through. She is at peace now, and she knows that you did everything you could. s
            Question: Why can't I post links or pictures?
            Question: Why can't I have a signature, avatar, or profile picture?
            Question: What's wrong with my account?

            Answer: You are in the "registered users" user group. This group is very limited in what it can do. This will annoy spammers to no end Just keep posting once you have been registered for 30 days and have made 11 posts your account will be "unlocked".

            It's really easy to put someone on ignore and it's strongly recommended that you do so with people who's posts you don't like.

            Step 1 - log in
            Step 2 - click on the "settings" link
            Step 3 - click on the "edit ignore list" link on the left side of the screen
            Step 4 - type (or paste if you copied and pasted it) the username of the person you want to ignore
            Step 5 - click the "ok" button on the right of the screen

            Easy peasy and will lower your blood pressure. One important note though, this won't hide quoted posts. It's an oversight on the developers part and it's not an easy thing to "fix." So if someone quotes someone you have ignored, you'll see the quote.

            Alternatively when you click on a person's name and view their profile page, underneath their avatar, there is a option that says, "Ignore this person". Click that link and then click the yes button.

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              #7
              Thank you to all the fine people who responded, I am still in shock and trying to come to grips with things. People are amazed that I am getting the neccacary done. As I said, I was there when she passed, I felt her spirt leave and she is now in paradise with Spirit. I did every thing I could - I am on auto-pilot - I am functional as I am wrapping things up. Thank you and bless ALL of you for your condolences - let's keep this beautiful place going - I will continue to post, as I have for years and I will pray for everyone to be well and happy. I am a survivor, Cynthia would wand me to be so I guess that is what I will do.
              Blessings to all
              THANK YOU
              Alex44
              Skypilot

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