OT November Chit Chat

[Cat Dancer]

So I am still here, still in bed around 22 hours a day, lying on one side or the other, not on my back, nit on my stomach, certainly not sitting up. Spent my two hours up today , getting up to go to the poll to vote. After the election dies down, I will get on the phone to figure out how to get an absentee ballot for future elections.

Thank goodness for my kindle. Im reading a book a day, and as an amazon prime member, im able to get lots of movies, tv shows and books for free -- well I guess not exactly free as prime costs $99/year, but that also gets me free shipping on a ton of stuff, so it works well for me. We hardly go to a physical store anymore, researching on line then going to amazon first to see if they have what we want

So I lie in bed, pphysical therapist drop in/out, visiting nurses drop in/ out, home care workers, cleaning lady. Always somebody pounding on the door. Monday I get to get up, travel 45 miles to the wound clinic to get my butt checked, scraped as needed. We sneak in a lunch on the way home, and a grocery stop. Then home and back to bed. Thrilliing.

Nutritional levels are still not up to "normal". I have gain
ed some weight, but have to be careful to not just gain weight, but gain nutrition. Not easy. Blood pressure still flucuates more than my doctor wants, but he doesnt know what to do about it.

So this is my boring life. You can understand why I dont post here too much-- nothing much to report.

[Howie]

Gary, she has you trained pretty well. You might want to keep her. Cat I spend most of my day on the bed. I get up to do cat chores, or make a meal, but my good electronics are here, so it's not bad. The cats even sleep IN the bed....darn cats....OH, not you!!!

[Pegakafarmgirl]

I am training my Joe in the fine art of cooking, and keeping the kitchen somewhat clean,hey he's a farmer,,he does things his way,, I for one can not wait to be good enough to take over,,

Cat,, a too slow of a process isn;t it,,hang in there,,I understand the frustrations..

a yucky day,, but I will have a better one tomorrow,,,

later

[Howie]

Peg, that the attitude you always have to keep.

[SalpalSally]

Hump Day Giggle!!

[Howie]

"Mustang Sally, slow that Mustang down!"

I was driving my dad's Mustang when that song came out. I remember him commenting how well it ran whenever I drove it. I told him it was the gas I put in it. I couldn't tell him it was because I ran it for all it was worth. Shame on me, but I loved my dad! Letting your 16 year old kid, drive your '66 Mustang convertible.

[Cherie]

Gary...there are no words. I ache for you and your family.

Jeanie...you too.

Peg, sounds so hopeful that you are recovering and Joe is cooking and the crops are in1

David and I just got back from 4 days at my parents in Upstate NY. I believe I have probably seen my Dad alive for the last time. He could go anytime or hang on for two or three weeks. Hospice RN was there this afternoon and increased the Fentanyl pain patch dose because he was still needing Morphine every couple of hours. He is still getting up and dressed and out to the living room to his recliner every day because Mom is demanding that of him even with the nurses saying he should not push it.
He had no color at all when we left today and had been up for nearly three hours before he could keep anything on his stomach. finally ate some blueberry pancakes I made for him and went back for seconds because there was still maple syrup on the plate that needed to be used....only the real stuff since he made it for more than 50 years on the farm. His Hospice Chaplain bought his syrup business and route and we brought 4 quarts home with us today. Mother is forgetting her heart meds because the schedule has become no schedule lately between emptying the catheter bags and dealing with nausea and vomiting and morphine dosing and all the visitors. Monday I checked her BP and heart rate and where she was hypotensive and rapid heart rate 3 months ago, now her BP is up and heart rate is between 40 and 55 and skipping beats and ankles swelling and she is short of breath. She told me she just wants to go to sleep and not wake up and maybe that would encourage Dad to let go. I left but siblings and 9 of their kids are checking in at least every day or two.

What do you do when your adult parents are passive aggressive and can't seem to let it go? I would have stayed and let David come home but it really would not have made a lot of difference. I am not indifferent. I hurt but I know they have set their own course which I have very little control over. My nephew took a week's vacation and is there till late tomorrow and his mom and sister are going up from here late Friday. I have 5 sibs up there who are checking in almost daily and Hospice is there at least 4-6 times a week. On top of that , members of the Amish community are there almost every day and the Hospice Chaplain is holding sunday services in their living room most weeks so they are getting all kinds of support. Dad, I think, is not ready to let go as he is really questioning his faith that he has been raised in all his Life. That's OK. We need not push him. This is his time.

[Howie]

DST Who needs it! I'm changing my clocks back tomorrow. IT'S 9:30 at night, and it's still light. Not in Howie's world!!!
....................................
OK, my mistake, I don't know AM from PM.

[nuthatch]

Well, I'm back with the living, finally! Since moving, I have been without internet and telephone for over a month. AT&T could not find our street on their outdated maps, so could not connect their phone lines to the new house, even though one of their boxes was at the street and the other neighbors have phone service! Incompetence abounds!
After many phone calls to finally get the phone connected, I decided to go with another company for DSL service. AT&T doesn't offer DSL now and are trying to get everyone to subscribe to U-verse @ close to $100 per month. Forget that!!! I still can't believe I had been paying $44 per month and I now have faster DSL for only 14.95 per month with the other company.

I'm still unpacking and trying to get settled. Read this thread last night and was saddened to read of all the troubles and losses so many are having here. My heart aches for those who are going through such hard times.

Finally had a little rain here. It was very welcome. Beautiful sunsets lately. Here's a pic of today's sunset and a pic of our Halloween afternoon visitor. I would have prefered a costumed child or a dozen, but no such luck! It was pouring rain!
sunset.jpgtarantula.jpg

[renee]

I HATE ATT.
I hate UVERSE.
No exaggeration here.
.
ATT is the most sleazy, aggressive corporation I have
ever dealt with. Carnival Cruise line is a close second.
Verizon DSL for 14.95 for the life of my phone number!

*Many of us here are at the typical age for losing parents.
It hurts but I'm glad I got to have mine as long as they wanted to hang in.

Cherie, I'm not quite sure how you mean passive aggressive as it applies
to your parents facing death and the language they use when they discuss
out loud choice of living or not living.
My dad didn't discuss it at all, only once whispering,
"sometimes you've had enough".

My mother was the child of a first generation english-american woman who chose
a stiff upper lip, an occasional four letter word with a martini. Grandmother
was a gentlewoman and a quick thinking sailor in port.

When in Hospice, mom had at least as many visits from younger people, non relatives,
who had felt her total acceptance and interest in their lives.
Rested, fed and stoked with morphine Mom became a stream of consciousness diatribe
on "why am I still here- everybody's dead business."
This to her kids.

It cracked me up when she started messing with us, goading us for her fun.
I think she made her exit when ready with nurses to hold her.

It is often the last earthly choice we can make, our party and timing is everything.

[agate]

nuthatch/Joan, I'd been wondering about you lately but must not have realized you'd be in the process of moving. Moving is an experience I do NOT want to go through ever again, and getting back on the Internet seems to be a huge problem for anyone who moves.

The photos must be taken from your new place--beautiful sunset! The premises come with a tarantula? It looks strikingly like the spider in Sally's Halloween image.

I was familiar with tarantulas when I was a kid, and some of them were jumbo-sized. I never got really chummy with any of them though.

Jeanie, you mention going up and down every aisle in a store to make sure you don't forget anything. That's exactly the opposite of my approach to a store. I go armed with a list, and the list is set up to follow the store layout. I try to go down as few aisles as possible. Even riding in a cart, making turns does things to my eyes and I can get dizzy.

Actually I haven't been in very many stores in the last 5 years--maybe one every few months. Whatever works for you is what you should do, of course.

[SalpalSally]

Welcome back Joan. I missed you. Happy New House! I also hate ATT. that's where I have my
DSL Which went up to 31.00 from 19,99 and is slower than ever. Now I know why. They keep
bugging me to get U-Verse...poopy on them!!

Hey, I heard that tarantulas are good to have around, as they eat all the little bugs..That is, if
you're not scared ****less of them,,Eeeeeek!!

You are all in my specialy Friends daily prayers and I hope that they are working to
help you all feel better in your lives..

[Gary]

I don't mind spiders but snakes on the other hand.......... A few years ago one of our cats brought me a huge snake (at least 25 feet long I believe) it was so happy and chased me across the yard.

We have a 65% chance of SNOW later this week. Although the long range forecast says a warmer and drier than usual winter. Every so often we get a winter with almost no snow but the bad side is it rains and stays muddy for days on end. Cats and dogs hate it. You wouldn't want to get your paws wet and muddy after all.

Nothing new to report. Just hanging around ya know...... Waiting on my MIL investment account to be disbursed it is a TOD (transfer on death) so Edward Jones has all the necessary paperwork they just have to move forward. I believe they have to have everyone's paperwork in their hand before they do anything. It isn't the money as much as I want it to be over. It has been hard on my wife. So I try to do any necessary paperwork so she doesn't have to. I try to have everything ready so all she does is sign. Later when everything is settled we can go over everything. I have everything arranged so that it will go straight into a savings account and stocks and bonds will go into our brokerage account. That way she can take all the time she wants and the money will be safe. Fortunately my MIL had set up family trusts and there should be almost nothing that has to be probated. Something that we need to do. Scribbling account numbers on the back of envelopes probably isn't the smartest way to run things.

Other than that I am just patiently waiting for spring!

In the next couple of weeks we will take the motorhome down to the house and start cleaning up to get it sold. She only owed 4 or 5 thousand on her house. We had a conversation a couple of weeks before she passed and she was looking foreword to not having a mortgage.

[Jeanie Z]

:) Hi everyone. Gary it took Merrill Lynch several months to close Mother's investments and trust although they had all the paperwork within days. I finally had to have the lawyer who had done Mother's will and the trust call them to get it done.

I went to bed last night after watching Jay Leno be on Fallon's show. I do not care for Fallon. I went right to sleep and got up a few times for nature's call but wound up in bed until 4 PM today. I am still tired.

I am getting next to nothing done when I am awake. My friend Bill who took care of Mother is 84 and is not well at all. My matron of honor from 1959 is in the nursing home in Jacksonville and now has pneumonia on top of her other problems and being on hospice for years. My 85 year old friend in Cleveland does not even leave his apartment unless it is to go to the doctor. He orders all delivered. I worry about him because he has no faith.

I did get my eyes checked and got a new pair of distance glasses so I can drive better. I cannot think of any place I want to go.

I have played over 9000 games of Solitaire on the computer with a 53% win ratio since David died. My computer now has a Trojan horse and I have had AVG fix it many times and Malwarebytes put 4 threats in isolation. My son is not able to come fix it right until next week.

I am not depressed enough to be suicidal but I miss being happy. I know being happy is a choice and I am not making great choices right now. I have it easy compared to Gary, Gabriella, Cat and my friends so I am going to be praying for my happy side to come back out.

Yesterday was 30 years since my father shot my brother and shot himself. I visited their graves when I was in Jacksonville. Out of 8 brothers and sisters I only have one brother and one sister left alive and I was next to the oldest.

Everyone take care and you are all in my prayers. Please say one for me. Thanks, Jeanie :)

[Howie]

Ooooh Sally said poopy, I'm telling!!!

Gary, I had a tarantula for years. My cats, back when I let them out, brought me many "gifts". Snakes, shrews, mice, birds. I felt so proud!

Jeanie, I had a script for new glasses, and let it expire after ONE YEAR. I just stay so busy!