1 in 3 Adults are Lonely.

[SuzE-Q]

Here's what can help:

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[Lazarus]

I am.........

[Howie]

I'm alone, but never lonely. I only have one now, but cats are great companions.

[stillstANNding]

Linda, I hear you.

I used to talk to Joy every day, multiple times a day. Even if I was home all week, I shared my life w her and she w me. That was for almost ten years. It’s a big hole to fill.

It’s hard to start relationships. People are busy. Their lives are established. Their routines are established. I am trying to get more people in my life but I find it extremely hard.

I’m lonely, too.
ANN

[Virginia]

I am lonely, but far more so now that I can't read. I hope I will be able to in another week or so. It does help. It doesn't solve the problem - it just helps.

[agate]

Virginia, are you able to listen to recorded books?

[Virginia]

Agate, I haven't tried because I thought this was going to be a short term thing, but it is turning out to be longer than I anticipated. I have two books downloaded on my Kindle and I want to start one so bad.

[agate]

I must be so used to being alone that I don't think much about it. It's hard to imagine having people to talk to in real life.

I see a couple of neighbors every day in passing in the hall, the laundry or outside. We exchange a few words.

My son and DIL call on Mother's Day and I have frequent e-mail contact with him and see them about once every 6 weeks, along with the little tad--who is a much bigger tad now. He keeps them busy.

As I think back to the early days with MS, I felt fairly cut off and sometimes felt isolated and desperate. That was long before the Internet. It would have been very helpful to have had the Internet back then.

About 3 years after the dx, I began having home helpers--typically about 4 hours a week, and they were someone to talk to. Actually their talking was sometimes a problem for a couple of them were more interested in talking than in getting the work done, but somehow we managed, and a couple of them became friends later on. I stayed in touch with one until unfortunately she died, and I'm still in contact with a couple of others.

I haven't had home helpers in the last 9 years (in this state I've moved to, they're costly) but if the need arises, it's good to know that they're still possible. There are always some working in this building--quite a few of them, actually. I see them in the laundry room and when they're taking out the trash for the people they work for.

Being alone has definite advantages if you're often having to cope with a flock of health problems. You can take care of yourself, do things at your own pace, sleep when you want to sleep, eat what you want to eat when you want, leave tasks undone until you're ready to do them, and just generally run your own show.

[Howie]

You can take care of yourself, do things at your own pace, sleep when you want to sleep, eat what you want to eat when you want, leave tasks undone until you're ready to do them, and just generally run your own show.

AMEN to that!!!

[Lazarus]

Still,
Although I like running my own show, I am doing it alone. I know you are thinking that I have John and we have our farm, but that is John’s love and I am happy to help him. But, it has been 30 years since I was social in my own right doing the things I love to do. My independently personal life has long ago disappeared except for a few tattered scraps of it.

[Sunshine]

I am lonely. This SPS is awful— any emotion, such as happy, excited, lots of stimulation, anger, fear, — any emotion, triggers painful neuropathy and painful muscle stiffening.

So it’s not fun to be around people. It’s painful.,,But I do it, because loneliness is painful.

Only recently have I been able to put on TV. The sound was causing stiffening. Less so now. TV voices help me not feel so isolated. Go figure.

Laz, you said it well.

[Earth Mother 2 Angels]

((((((Hugs to All)))))) ~

I wish I could reach through this monitor and hug all of you for real.

While I have the constant companionship of Jim and Jon, and occasional visitors (nurse, toenail team, John), I am lonesome for the days, when Jon could ride in the van, and we could all get out together.

I'm lonesome for my girlfriends, and I'm sad, when they have gatherings, which I can't attend. I've missed weddings, funerals, parties, lunches, concerts, even just talking on the phone.

I accept the circumstances, of course, but I still long for the active social life we once had, and so do Jim and Jon.

For all, who are lonely, you are not alone.

Love & Light,



Rose

[funnylegs4]

I have never really been lonely. But I know many people who feel lonely.

[funnylegs4]

I am lonely. This SPS is awful— any emotion, such as happy, excited, lots of stimulation, anger, fear, — any emotion, triggers painful neuropathy and painful muscle stiffening.

So it’s not fun to be around people. It’s painful.,,But I do it, because loneliness is painful.

Only recently have I been able to put on TV. The sound was causing stiffening. Less so now. TV voices help me not feel so isolated. Go figure.

Laz, you said it well.

Try close captions and/or open captions if the low setting gets annoying to the muscles.

[agate]

funnylegs, maybe you have better luck with closed captions than I do. I really appreciate it when they work well but often they don't, or maybe it's my TV's problem.

There's quite a lag time, important words and whole sentences aren't captioned, or the captioning is a garbled mess. But when they're in good working order, they're very helpful.