It's a Long, Long Road We Spinies Must Travel,,,,,,,,,,,,

[Frost]

...................Guess not, then.

See ya!

[Mark N]

Frost, you are right about the long road we travel. I think back to all my family and I have gone through the past 20 years dealing with this disease. I worked 6 years too long and probably about 12 years which I am paying for now. Along the way I have had some wonderful times but they have always been colored by pain. Right now our two young granddaughters are a wonderful part of our life but I find I miss out on too much of it. They sure do brighten up my day when they come over for a visit. The youngest one at 1.5 yrs is at that stage she is into everything exploring and always on the go; she wears grandpa out.

How have the anvil sales been going? I hope you see this and write back as I always enjoyed your stories and outlook on life. I don't know if you remember Brion Larson but I keep up with him on FB and cancer is back and looks like it will win this time. He has had some quality years after beating cancer earlier but you can tell he is bummed out about it killing him this time.

[jennys mom]

Mark have they ever offered you the implanted stimulator on a trail basis? I have been on this list since 98 just don't talk ... Just hate seeing you suffer so much all this time. I am in the process of getting my trial now I am so anxious to see if it works as people who have them sure are impressed.

[Mark N]

jennys mom, it isn't anything I am interested in based on the odds of it working. I hope it works out well for you as anything we can find that works better for us is worth it. I have excepted my situation and I know my A personality kept me pushing for too long instead of excepting how things were. I asked my daughter when she was a junior in HS if she missed out on too much because of my disability the past 5 years. Her answer shocked me because she said "no you have been disabled my whole life" and she was right but I never saw myself that way. Even though my pain and disability right now I still don't really see myself disabled.

Once again good luck with the trial on the implanted stimulator.

[Mark N]

I saw this post and thought I would write again. After the usual lost day due to sleep, to make up for the lack of quality sleep over two days, I wake and you have to wonder how much our lives matter. Yet I still strive to see the next day and do what I can; I guess the spirit refuses to quit.

[jennys mom]

When I took my evaluation to get on the list for my scs one of my questions I was ask was what I would wish for if I could wish for anything. I said I would wish that they could come up with something to help all spineys in pain and that we could live a normal life.... the dr told me he had never had anyone answer that question that way. It told me hes never been in chronic pain...we all need to keep hoping for a miracle I guess but I am not ready to quit this fight quit yet. I just got a new camera never had a real nice one before. But I think I will enjoy taking pictures of the geese, turkeys, and deer at our farm. Grandkids of course will be the favorite. I have had to totally redo who I am but its not so bad in some ways...... I am sure you also have learned to appreciate the small things and watching our precious grands...... will check again someday and hope to see your posts.......

[Mark N]

Jenny, you are right about what most of us would like to wish for as I have forgotten what a pain free from CP is like. Like you have have remade myself and appreciate the little things I can do. Our two granddaughters have brightened up my life as young children have a different perspective on life. Enjoy your camera and get all the pictures you want as they are fun to look at over the years.

[always-aching]

Wow, it's really been a long time . . .

My computer has been updated at work and I was going through some bookmarks and came across BT. It's been a while since I've posted. Spinal issues are the same, well, not really, they're worse. I've developed a new issue in my thoracic area, between my shoulder blades and cannot get any relief. I have anklyosing spondylitis and osteoarthritis, several bulges in my cervical and thoracic spine, osteophytes pressing on nerves and the pain monster just keeps attacking. I am looking at retiring this year because I can't stand it anymore. Plus, the job just keeps piling on more responsibilities. They don't want to hear that I am a spiney and cannot do the things they are asking me to do.

On the brighter side, I have a beautiful granddaughter who is five years old and she's keeping me young. I adore her to pieces.

Hope all is well with everyone!

[Mark N]

a-a, It is good to hear from you again. I have found that deep muscle massage have really helped me reduce some of my pain. Like you have find that I have more pain and limitations as the years go by and now not wanting to increase my pain meds the massage helps a lot. I really feel for you about the thoracic pains as I suffer in the same area along with my cervical issues now. I was surprised how much muscle tightness I could get relieved by massage but it is something I have to continue to do every couple of weeks or so. I hope you can retire when you want and not just because of the pain and spinie issues. I had to retire two decades before I wanted to retire and I don't wish that for anyone.