This is what I remember.
I stopped running suddenly. I was aware that something was deeply wrong. I turned around 360 degrees. I had no idea where I was. I had no idea where these trails went. I had no idea how I got here or where I was going. Nothing was familiar.
It was such an odd and foreign sensation. It felt different from being lost. It felt like I was being denied access to the information in my brain that would tell me where I was. I was blank. I could not understand what was happening to me.
Did I make a connection with MS? Until then I had four MS attacks, I’d been paralyzed twice, suddenly and without warning. So maybe. Everything about MS seemed weird so perhaps this was MS too?
What I do remember is that I was working really hard to just keep my sh** together. Keeping my breathing under control (like any good runner would). So I don’t think I spent anymore than the obvious amount of time considering my loss of where-ness.
I walked along a trail toward the middle of the meadow and came to a stream. It was shallow, clear, maybe 6 feet across (I’m 6ft. tall). It had stones and sand on the bottom; anyway, it wasn’t a muddy bottom. I remember the banks were not very high, maybe a foot, and that they were grassy and green.
I remember sitting on the grassy trail next to the stream.
At some point while I was sitting there, I distinctly remember that I saw some water boatman, a type of large beetle with long paddle’s for front feet, which they use to swim across the water surface, leaving tangled wakes behind them.
Time passed, I don't know how much; maybe one hour, maybe three, I didn't have a watch on.
When I looked up from the stream I recognized the low wooded hills that surrounded the tall grasses in the middle of the meadow. I recognized the trail that ran east to Sunset Point. I recognized the trial that went south out of the meadow back to the car. I walked or ran back to my car.
I stopped running suddenly. I was aware that something was deeply wrong. I turned around 360 degrees. I had no idea where I was. I had no idea where these trails went. I had no idea how I got here or where I was going. Nothing was familiar.
It was such an odd and foreign sensation. It felt different from being lost. It felt like I was being denied access to the information in my brain that would tell me where I was. I was blank. I could not understand what was happening to me.
Did I make a connection with MS? Until then I had four MS attacks, I’d been paralyzed twice, suddenly and without warning. So maybe. Everything about MS seemed weird so perhaps this was MS too?
What I do remember is that I was working really hard to just keep my sh** together. Keeping my breathing under control (like any good runner would). So I don’t think I spent anymore than the obvious amount of time considering my loss of where-ness.
I walked along a trail toward the middle of the meadow and came to a stream. It was shallow, clear, maybe 6 feet across (I’m 6ft. tall). It had stones and sand on the bottom; anyway, it wasn’t a muddy bottom. I remember the banks were not very high, maybe a foot, and that they were grassy and green.
I remember sitting on the grassy trail next to the stream.
At some point while I was sitting there, I distinctly remember that I saw some water boatman, a type of large beetle with long paddle’s for front feet, which they use to swim across the water surface, leaving tangled wakes behind them.
Time passed, I don't know how much; maybe one hour, maybe three, I didn't have a watch on.
When I looked up from the stream I recognized the low wooded hills that surrounded the tall grasses in the middle of the meadow. I recognized the trail that ran east to Sunset Point. I recognized the trial that went south out of the meadow back to the car. I walked or ran back to my car.
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