News of Jeanie

[Virginia]

Agate, this truly saddens me. She had relied on Jim to bring her things and take care of things more than Andy since going into the rehab. I know that Andy will try his best to take up the slack. She use to say she didn't know what she would do without her boys. She talked to each of them every day. What a hard time she is going through.

I don't know what they can do about the fluid in her legs. I wish a Doctor would go by to see her and see if he can make her more comfortable.

My heart aches for Jeanie. She didn't have much before this to look forward to, but she did have both her boys and their visits.

[Ikoiko]

Oh, no! That is terrible about Jim! Heat stroke!!! Was he exercising outdoors? He was younger than me. So scary.

[agate]

This is terribly sad. I know she counted on both her sons and they were there for her. I wish things could improve for her, and there's so little any of us can do to help.

Ikoiko, I don't know anything more about her son's death. She just said that he died of heat stroke. There has been brutally hot weather this summer.

I will let Jeanie know that the people here are thinking of her.

[Virginia]

I decided to call Jeanie this afternoon. I am constantly amazed at her strength. She says she has a lot of faith and that she relies on it. Jim had been to see her, I think she said the day before. He was working outside surveying in another county and it was over 100 degrees that day. He must have felt weak because he went to sit in his truck with the air conditioner on. A couple walked by and noticed him sitting there with his head bent over on his chest like he was sleeping. They came back by some time later and he was still in the same position, so that is how he was found. He did have high blood pressure and was on medication for it. Jeanie says she doesn't know what they put on his death certificate, but she feels it was definitely from the heat.

Jeanie was called by Carla who told her Jim was gone and Jeanie said gone where and Carla told her. She says Carla is a basket case and that so is their 34 year old son. He is single and had an apartment of his own, but right now he has moved back in with his Mother. Jeanie calls Carla every day, but the answering machine is now full of calls and Carla and her Grandson call her most every night. They get on a speaker phone so they can all hear.

She is strengthened by the fact that she says Jim was also a person of faith. She says she never knew it but he journaled a lot about his prayers for that day. She is so glad about this because it is such an important part of her life. Andy is not a person of faith and she said she told him this needed to be a wake up call for him.

I asked her about her own health and she said it was good. She did mention the swelling in her legs and abdomen which I think is very concerning if it is also in her abdomen. I asked if she was on any fluid pills and she said she didn't want to take them.

Andy had his hip surgery and is doing well. Before he went in he brought her a bunch of books. She says he doesn't know what she would do without her books. He also brought 3 crates of the diet drinks that she drinks and some ritz crackers, chips and Hersey bars. I was asking if I could ship something to her, so she was telling me about everything he brought.

Her former husband came down from Maine with his girlfriend. He went to see her but did not take the girlfriend with him. Jeanie has met her before but she said without her they could talk better about the past. I got tickled. She said it had been 5 years since she had seen him and that he had really aged. She says more than she has.

She still has been unable to see and hear the Memorial Service for Jim, or at least very well. Andy had it on his phone but they want to download it to an ipad at the nursing home so she can see it and hear it better. The quality on Andy's iphone was not good. However, his phone is not compatible with the ipad they have so he is going to have to put it on Google Chrome or something like that and then they will be able to download it for her. I hope they can because Carla, the Grandson and Andy all spoke at the service. It was held in a chapel that is close to their house. Jim helped build the chapel and surveyed the land in back of it.

[agate]

Thank you, thank you, for calling Jeanie, Virginia!

I had just written her a note. I'm glad there are people in her corner, even her former husband.

It's good to know that Andy's hip surgery went well. Jeanie is doing fairly well in spite of everything that has been thrown at her, it seems to me, and I'm really glad that the DIL is still coming through with some extra provisions and books.

[agate]

I called Jeanie just now and she was in a good mood, unaffected by the hurricane except for seeing the trees being whipped around by the winds. She didn't know the storm was coming until her sister called her from Tennessee and told her to get away from windows. Her dog was scared of all of the thunder and lightning and hid in a closet. She hopes that the dog can be brought to visit her soon.

She's still getting books from her DIL and says she reads a book a day!

She can't transfer from the bed to a chair and says you can't go home if you can't do that. Still no physical therapy, and she says it's difficult to communicate with the staff because most of them speak Creole. I had suggested that she ask the doctor there to prescribe more PT for her or at least to find someone on the staff there and make that request. She has an air mattress and gets turned from side to side. The doctor who comes spends "about two minutes" in the room and comes only every couple of months.

The widow of the son who died was married to him for 42 years and has never lived alone. Now she's having panic attacks and is afraid to be alone. So Jeanie's grandson has been staying with her there.

The other son had his second hip replacement at the end of August and is slowly doing better. He feeds a couple of feral cats regularly.

She loves hearing from the BrainTalk people, she says. I told her renee was asking about the people in Florida.

[Virginia]

I have thought of calling Jeanie again, but I have felt that with my own personal circumstances being what they are that maybe I should wait another couple of weeks. I don't want to make her sad. I will call and talk to her when I feel I can, she seems to enjoy it. I am waiting to find out when those of us here in Raleigh will get a copy of the memorial service for my brother. I am afraid it will open the wound even deeper and yet I want to see it. This might be the situation Jeanie is in.

[agate]

She mentioned that there is a video or maybe it was a Zoom session of her son's service but she hadn't been able to see it because of having no laptop. I think she said it was a laptop that was needed. The son who died was the one who had technical know-how. The other son doesn't. I thought maybe the nursing home staff could help her to get to that video but she said that most of the staff people are Haitian and don't speak English much at all.

[Virginia]

There is supposed to be a video of my brother's service even the outside part with the honor guard. It was done by his oldest Grandson who is in a business that has caused him to have to do this kind of thing. I hope he didn't goof up. It is taking him a long time. He is making a copy for everyone in the family, but he was moving from one city to the other when the funeral took place and then he had to travel for a week or so. I want to see the eulogies. He was one of the speakers and has done public speaking. I was told he was awesome.

[Virginia]

I called Jeanie yesterday afternoon. She is doing the same and sounds really good. She says she is at peace and has made peace with her circumstances.

Jeanie has read about 1,000 books since she has been in the nursing home. She said it has been almost 35 months. Carla, her daughter-in-law is still getting the books for her and has only duplicated one once in all that time. She keeps a list on her computer and makes sure that she doesn't get the same book twice.

Carla is doing much better now that some time has passed since Jim's death. Jeanie says she still has a ways to go but is better than she was. She has joined a grief support group and their son is still staying with her. They went to see Jeanie the night before I called and Jeanie says she was upbeat and that helped her a lot. They took Jeanie's dog to see her. The dog is getting quite elderly now. Jeanie says Carla and her grandson talk to her every night on the phone.

Andy is really stepping up to the plate. He keeps her supplied with the drinks and crackers she likes so much. He goes to see her at least twice a week and sometimes more often. He files her toenails, puts cream on her feet and puts clean socks on her.

The really big news is that Andy got married. Some of you may remember that his wife died about 6 years ago and he had started dating a lady by the name of Tory. I think he met her through Jeanie. They went to the courthouse the end of February and got married. Then they had a wedding the first of this month on the beach. They had a reception for 30 people after that. Jeanie's former husband came to the wedding and he and Andy went together to see Jeanie. She says she likes Tory and is glad they got married.

She says she eats chicken about 4 nights a week. They fix it different ways. It was getting to be close to 5PM and that is when they bring her supper. She said I can guarantee you it is chicken, but it turned out to be soup and sandwich. She said she must have ordered it.

She has changed rooms and it was quite over the phone. I didn't ask if it is always like that. She says this roommate is "not all there". None of her roommates, it seems has been. However, she didn't say this one bothers her.

She sends greetings and love to all who are here. I will add she is still as sweet as ever.

[agate]

Thank you so much for calling Jeanie!

A new daughter-in-law sounds like another person in Jeanie's corner, and that is certainly good news.

Putting up with roommates has to be dreary. Let's hope that she'll soon get a roommate who is sane, considerate, and quiet.

[agate]

Today is Jeanie Z's birthday!

[Virginia]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO JEANIE!! I KNOW JEANIE'S FAMILY WILL DO ALL THEY CAN TO SEE THAT IT IS A GOOD ONE

[agate]

Maybe somehow she'll be able to view the greetings here too.

[Virginia]

I talked to Jeanie this afternoon. She says she is the same. She still reads. Her DIL still gets her books and they talk on the phone, but she doesn't go very often. Jeanie says she is pretty much a hermit. Jeanie's grandson is still staying with his mother. I think they both had to go to the hospital in July with panic attacks. That was the first anniversary of her son's death.

Jeanie's other son Andy still goes usually twice a week. He and his new wife are going tomorrow and his wife is going to shampoo Jeanie's hair and maybe cut it a little.

She says she doesn't have to cook or do laundry anymore and she is glad about that. The roommate situation is about the same. She says it could be worse. Also, she says the place could be worse. The first one she was in was really bad, she said with mice and cockroaches.

She still gets two breathing treatments a day for COPD, but was still coughing quite a bit while we talked. She still takes LDN nightly. She gets it from a compounding pharmacy. She says she doesn't want to find out what she would be like without it.

The food is still edible. She had a good lunch that she enjoyed today, but that is not always true. She does fill out a menu and puts more things than she wants because they often don't bring enough.

I can't think of anything else, so I guess that kind of covers it.