The pain is ridiculous

[houghchrst]

all day long unless I spend most of my day in my room laying around. I cry pretty much everyday because I am so tired of dealing with everything. I have to pay mentally and physically for everything that I do. Every move I make. Throw on that fighting Social Security, Department of Human Services, shut off notices, pain, pain, pain. I am able to finish very little that I start because it involves some kind of physical labor.

I realized today that I have been manic for over a year now and didn't even know it. Shows where my head is at. I just thought it was stress but I am making myself ill. Mentally worse. My pdoc wants to try me on something new. An antipsychotic, I thought of you Prot and an article you just posted about antipsychotics for Bipolar. I think I am going to let her try it. I am normally leery of trying something something so new and with so many possible SEs. She is concerned too because she knows how med sensitive I am. I am desperate.

The med is called Saphris.

Anybody?

[Deedeelyn]

Hi Chris,

I'm so sorry to hear you are going through such a difficult time. Wish I had some brillant words of comfort for you. I found this about Saphris:

Only registered and activated users can see links., Click Here To Register...


I have had to take antipsychotics for years now, but I'm pretty tolerant with meds. I have only found a couple that I can't take. I hope this is your answer. It's good you do your research. Sometimes just knowing what the side effects are help to prepare you and be proactive in combating them.

Good luck, (((hugs)))
Deedee

[Buttons2]

Chris, sure wish I had some answers. good luck with the new drug. ((((gentle hugs)))) Pati

[Leeaelle]

Bless your heart Chris ~ I know how frustrating it can be. Thru the years, I've found myself feeling hopeless, but since I've been on an antidepressant, I don't feel so bad! I sure hope the new medication works well for you. I can't imagine how you must feel every day!! You sure have had alot on your shoulders!

Take care & know that we're with you. You're in my thoughts & prayers. God bless. Hugs, Lee

[tic chick]

hey chris,

I haven't used saphris. it's a new atypical antipsychotic drug. i have been reading up on it on wikipedia, trying to get an understanding of the brain receptors it works on and what other meds you are taking. Only registered and activated users can see links., Click Here To Register...

okay. i don't know what drugs you are on now, i remember waves mentioning effexor in the bipolar forum thread. i think she has very good points about lowering other drugs generally and probably specifically when you begin taking a new one.

i remember you being on abilify, which was also an atypical antipsychotic drug. i think you said you were on klonopin. klonopin is a drug that does make you tend to forget nouns sometimes. i've been taking it about 20 years and when i started taking it i had that difficulty much more than i do now.

okay, back to saphris. you put it under your tongue and let the pill dissolve there. that sounds to me like the drug get's to your system faster. i see on wikipedia that the bioavailability of the drug is 35%. maybe that's why it's sublingual also, because if it had to go thru the digestive tract, it would have less effect and by going the sublingual route, more gets to your body.

it also has a high affinity for a lot of neurotransmitters. serotonin, epinephrine, dopamine and histamine. that means it binds to these receptors and causes an effect on them. it seems like it MIGHT make your mood better, make you a bit more energetic, maybe help your gut probs and help lower the inflammation in your body (that's the histamine receptor). okay, so you might have to look at the drugs you're taking now and see which ones you're taking for those probs and maybe have your doctor lower the dosage on that drug for awhile. i'm thinking the effexor, which is for depression, since saphris binds to the serotonin receptors already. maybe lowering the klonopin for a while and whatever drug you take for fibromyalgia, which saphris might help with because of its binding to histamine which lowers your inflammatory response. the drug doesn't seem to effect your sharpness of memory. it doesn't seem to cause weight gain. i think you might have to watch out for an inner restlessness, or irritability. that usually happens when a drug binds to the adrenaline receptors, like saphris does. but, saphris seems to bind to a variety of neurotransmitters and that might make it more balanced than atypical antipsychotics that only bind to 1 or 2 receptors.

it does say that saphris is an ANTAGONIST to some receptors. you have to ask your doctor which ones those are and see if that might cause you probs or maybe need a change of dosage in a drug you're taking.

now remember, I AM JUST A LAYPERSON...lol! it means i'm not a professional and i could be misinterpreting what this drug might or might not do. you really have to get your doctor to discuss those neurotransmitters and their functions to you and how the drug saphris would relate to those. maybe print the wikipedia page and take it to her and show her that section.

i believe that to a certain extent that we can train our minds in ways that form new pathways in the brain or modify our neurotransmitters. i used to have those racing thoughts and inability to concentrate on things for too long until i started weeding in the garden about 20 years ago. i had always let my husband take care of the yard since i took care of the inside of the house. but, as you know, weeding is a mindless, repetitive, boring thing to do. there is nothing to think about other than getting the darn root of the weed out. i actually think by weeding for hours, that somehow my neurotransmitters were modified and i became a calmer, less reactive person. of course, this took years. and i STILL weed, plus more.

so don't take all i said as gospel. it's just what my interpretation is. and do ask your doctor if maybe the saphris will let you lower the dosage of some of the other drugs you are taking. ask the doctor to explain the affinity for all those neurotransmitters and what it might mean to YOUR brain and ask the doctor what neurotransmitters this drug might antagonize and what that might mean to YOUR brain!

IMHO,
jeannie

[houghchrst]

Thank you for the info guys.
I haven't started yet, forgot to call today while she was in.
My depression, anger, frustration has become insurmountable. I am so angry that I can do so little, that every move hurts. I don't want to take pain meds everyday. I am only 46 and at this rate I will be immobile by 50. My feet, ankles and knee hurt constantly so just walking to the bathroom is painful. The arthritis is gaining fast. That's not even all of the spots that hurt. I seem to have developed tennis elbow in my left elbow. My right elbow was about useless for a little over a year last time I got it. Don't know what started it. Back injections coming up hopefully soon.


I am so angry, tears of anger and resentment are frequent. I thought I was dealing with this when I came to the realization that I was going to be disabled for the rest of my life both mentally and physically but as things seem to get worse quickly I have gone into the why me, it's not fair etc.

I want to do so little, just tend to my flowers, have a little garden, go for walks, play badminton lol.

The bf still has not found a job. Offers are nothing near us, all are about an hour away or more and we don't have a reliable car so he has had to turn down a couple.

SSI has turned into a farce even though the judge found me disabled. I will not get all of my money but I guess some is better than none. Had to limit my political watching because it makes things so much worse. I cannot believe the level of ignorance and carelessness in the human race. Just makes me more depressed. Gee so instead I have been doing a bit of advocating for homeless dogs. Like that is any more cheerful lol. If I had a fence I would do fostering because of all the room. At least I can get out with my Brody. I try to get out once a day and make a bit of a circuit of the yard. Sometimes I can do all the way around. I do have a couple of well placed places to sit if the pain overtakes me which it usually does.

I am exhausted.

[teddiebears]

Hi Christina. I'm so sorry to hear you're suffering like this. I wish had had something more helpful to say. I recognized your username and here and just wanted to offer my support.

I'm not sure if you'll remember me - I'm teddiebears - because it's been quite a long time since I've posted anything in these forums.

Take care..........

[houghchrst]

Of course I remember you. How have you been? It is good to hear from you and thank you.

[teddiebears]

Of course I remember you. How have you been? It is good to hear from you and thank you.

It was good to hear you remember me. And thanks for asking about me. For the most part I guess I'm doing okay.

My COPD isn't progressing too quickly, thank goodness. I had a serious case of pneumonia awhile ago that put me in the hospital a couple days but I made it through that okay. This summer I celebrated my 13th anniversary of sobriety :o and in December, it'll be 16 years since I quit smoking. :o

My back pain is about the same - maybe a little worse (occurs more often, lasts longer each time). But battling depression has been my biggest issue. And my OCD hoarding/spending is starting to be more of a problem again.

I stopped by the Alcoholism, Addiction & Recovery forum and was really surprised to see no one there. Then I went to the Smoking Forum and found there wasn't much activity there either. So I started checking out the rest of the forums and decided to stop in here and was pleasantly surprised to see someone I knew. :o lol

I sure hope things begin to get better for you soon. Take Care.

[puddykat]

Hello Christina, Think you'll remember me, haven't posted for awhile. My signature tells all. I understand exactly how you feel. SO and I had a discussion why I don't want to leave the house.....pain...and other assorted things that go with dementia. You have fibro as I do, and it's starting to rule my life along with other crap. My 1984 lower spinal fusion is making itself known more; I've fallen a couple of times or backed into things, always hitting my back, like I have a bullseye painted back there<G>LOL
Went to granddaughter's birthday party, sitting in wrong place as all these people, mostly kids, walked in, I had immediate panic attack until they all got past me; thank God my daughter talked me down. Maybe you have problems with going places also? or not going?, feeling guilty besides.
I'm med sensitive also, I do hope these new pills, if you take them, help you hon. I've always enjoyed your posts, just haven't kept up as depression is terrible too....there is one site, only one, where I post. I pray things get better for you hon. Sending you gentle hugs and lotsa love!!!, kat :)

[Beader]

Hi Christina,
How are those meds working for you? Any improvement? Just stumbled on this thread...

Kat,
What kind of puddy is in your pic? I have a chocolate Burmese who may become an avatar.
I hear you about sitting in the wrong place as the crowd thickens. Going places issues ebb & flow, sometimes worse than others. I tend to build up pressure on myself re family event dinners/holidays & then my Fibro/CFS explodes & I'm canceling again. Much to my chagrin & embarrassment. It's getting on to thirty years now.
I hope you return & feel comfortable here again. I just came back after several years away & forgetting about BT. Still can't figure out where all the crowds went...

Sher

[houghchrst]

Hi Beader, no unfortunately the meds were a bust. Horrible, the only way I could get through the almost two weeks I was on them was to sleep. Not really conducive to anything I had to do lol. So we stopped them and then almost immediately DHS killed my insurance due to a lazy worker so I went through almost two months of withdrawal. Oh yeah and I had a nervous breakdown not long after the Saphris and wound up in outpatient emergency treatment. Have developed strong heart palpitations since then also. LOL. Yeah.

But today...today is good. Yes I still hurt but due to it being some semblance of winter I haven't been out much so am not wearing myself out as bad. Though here in Michigan our weather is not very kind to those of us with sensitive moods and aches and pains. Rain then snow, windy and cold then balmy and cloudy. Most of my meds are the same. Still the Effexor ER. I did manage to get off of a Benzo during that withdrawal but discovered that I need my asthma and my thyroid med and that bit of Effexor. Kind of wonder how much of my problems came from that little bit of Klonopin every night.

I had to stop the political stuff, kept me in panic mode. News is not at the top of my list. The state of the world makes me sick so only deal in bits and pieces. I also am working on letting some other things go.

UGH! It is constant work lol. I try to keep from thinking too much and sticking to my little corner of the world.

Kat! I am so glad to see you. I owe you an email! I am so sorry your depression is ruling your life. You know I often live that life also. I really don't go out hardly at all anymore. Don't have much reason to unless you count doc appts., store or library. Money is tight as usual. I am still trying to get my life back together after 2010. I don't feel so well around groups I don't know, people I don't know. I make a perfectly good wall flower lol. An even better homebody.

My back is ridiculously fibro sensitive. I can barely stand to have it touched, breathed on lol whatever and my lower back is a constant source of pain. Arthritis in many areas.

I hope you feel up to posting more. We miss you in the Emotional Support forum too.

I am still here though usually in the Emotional Support forum.

[puddykat]

Beader, my cat is as close as I could get to my real kitty which is a Manx. She was out wandering, found, now we have her for last 7 yrs. Usually born w/o a tail but our is a 'rumpy', has tail couple inches long with fur makes it look longer. They're known to act more like dogs then cats......and ours does :) She's a doll. Thanks for asking. kat

[Beader]

Cats Rule!

Hi Kat,
Well, I've never personally know a Manx, altho' they look cute in the cat mags. My first Burmese [who was also a 'finder'] was tres petite but very doggy-like, following me from room to room. Very affectionate without monopolizing the lap full-time. That's something my half-Maine Coon was so good at. Sit down, instant lap, cat in it. Drives you crazy when you're in motion a lot that day.

Hi Chris,
Sorry to hear the meds didn't work out. As they tell us repeatedly -- everybody reacts differently. Now if only the researchers could tackle that part of the equation better and be able to predict more accurately. In the future when everyone's genome is completely mapped out from birth, then maybe the docs will be able to prescribe more precisely. Or cook up specific antidotes for each of us. Cheap would be good too. And taking into account our body clocks and time of day might help as well. Not many night owl patients fare well with early bird surgeons. OK, I can dream, right?

Sher

[puddykat]

Hi Beader (Well, I've never personally know a Manx, altho' they look cute in the cat mags. My first Burmese [who was also a 'finder'] was tres petite but very doggy-like, following me from room to room. Very affectionate without monopolizing the lap full-time. That's something my half-Maine Coon was so good at. Sit down, instant lap, cat in it. Drives you crazy when you're in motion a lot that day.) Don't know how to quote, did it this way; copy/paste.

Don't know how big your 1/2 Coon was but ordinarilly don't they get quite big with lots of long hair? My memories not good at all, but right now that's what I see in mind. Look very heavy but beautiful. Luckily with that type personality they'll jump into lap w/o lifting...don't think I could lift one of those. I have trouble lifting box of litter. Do have to keep Manx butt hair cut short (nick name for them but forgot...butt poopers ???) as fecus sticks to hair; sometimes find a 'left behind' dropoff on floor somewhere :) On occasion she recognizes I'm having a seizure, altho I stand very still, no moving at all, no talking etc. She starts jumping up/down on front of me for all she's worth to get me out of it. Last time was first time she saw me have one right in front of her, amazing. Do you still have both your cats? Just got my new monthly cat mag, anxious to look it over. Could go on/on :) She eats, lounges on big soft pillow on couch; our kitchen/din/living room, one huge room; all windows, so no matter where she sits, has birds eye view of everything....to have a cats' life, huh?<G> Do love my sleeping companion. Wish more people talked about their pets on pet therapy..... have good day, kat