June chitchat

[agate]

Virginia, I didn't realize that the roofers might have to remove the skylights and go on roofing, with debris falling right into your place! Did the china piece break as a result of the roofing? Do you have homeowner's insurance that might help in some way?

Just the effort of clearing up the debris must be difficult. I dread the day when someone might decide I need new carpeting or painting here just because of all of the extra physical effort involved on my part. It isn't at all likely to happen since spending money isn't something this building does, and so in a way I'm lucky.

About the tint or other questions you might have about the roofers (like how long they will be there), are you allowed to communicate with them at all? If you can find the foreman and ask a few questions, those people have always been helpful whenever I've asked them anything.

[Virginia]

They replaced the skylights. I just assumed the new ones would be like the old ones. It didn't occur to me that they would be completely clear. If I had not agreed to pay an extra $2'000 and something happened that the old skylights began to leak I would have been responsible for the damage. So, I got new ones in order to get the 10 year warranty on them. My old ones had never leaked, but I was afraid one might start so I figured I better get the new ones.

The debris came down inside while they had the old skylight off. Did I mention I swept up two roofing nails off the kitchen floor and a short one on the dining room carpet. The plate that fell was on a far wall from the skylight. It just jarred it and it fell and broke. I was at fault with that mishap because I looked at that plate last night and knowing it was fragile I told myself to get up and go try to take it down. I just felt too tired to do it. I reasoned that because it was on an outside wall in the living room it would be fine.

I now have to find someone to put some things that go up high back up. My brother Eric's oldest son is 6:3 or a little more and very strong. He took everything down, but now he has returned to work and will not be home for several months. I just can't worry about it, but clutter does kind of bother me.

I have a neighbor who is also happy about the skylights being clear.

I think they will be out of this area in a couple of days, but not out of the neighborhood.

[agate]

If they replaced the skylights, shouldn't they have replaced them with something that was almost exactly like what you had? I mean, if you had tinted ones and found them to your liking, shouldn't they give you tinted ones this time? It might make a considerable difference in the comfort level of the place as well as in the cooling expense. But maybe having more light is something you'd prefer?

Roofing nails as I recall are big and look like something you definitely don't want to step on. Would a magnet pick them up when you see them lying around?

Maybe you could rethink whether you want the things that were up high to be so high. My life was ever so much easier after I realized that if I got rid of somethings I no longer used, I could get rid of some high kitchen cabinet shelves. I took them down and stacked them in an out of the way place and now can reach everything in the kitchen much more easily--but there is less storage space, of course.

You might be able to find some alternative storage units for things that would make them more reachable. I'm always surprised by how many options there are on the market when it comes to "storage solutions," and some aren't ridiculously priced.

[Prot]

One of my favourite singer songwriters. He had MS.

[agate]

Thank you for sharing this, Tim! I hadn't heard of him and so looked him up. His is a story of determination in spite of the MS--reminding me of this board's Sunshine 2 (formerly BBS1951) with her continued surfing, no matter how difficult it became.

Only registered and activated users can see links., Click Here To Register...

[Virginia]

Agate, the things that were up high are decorative things that I got to put where they were. So I want to get them back up. My ceilings in this area are 18 feet high. The things I have up were bought to break up so much wall space.

My brother called today and asked about the roofing job. I told him what happened with the skylight and the debris on the floor and the strip of roofing that fell. He thinks they had cut the skylight too large and had to cut the area it fits in down. He wishes I had taken pictures of everything on the floor. I didn't think about it, but that is what I should have done.

[agate]

I never think to take pictures in situations like that either. He's probably right, though. It just doesn't seem right that the roofers have messed up your own space. Shouldn't they have cleaned up after themselves? Isn't that the usual way?

Today, for instance, landscapers were doing some pruning of shrubs around this building's yard. I noticed that they lopped off branches all over and left the branches lying on the ground and the patios for hours. They did come back much later and cleaned up the debris but in the meantime a neighbor who is very unstable on her feet was walking her two dogs in that yard, and I saw her almost fall because of the branches cluttering up the yard. I even went out to make sure she wasn't on the ground. Every time there has been work done here, the deal was always that the workmen were supposed to clean up any mess they made.

Ceillings 18 feet high??? Are those called "cathedral ceilings"? I've seen them mentioned in real estate descriptions. It must feel very elegant to have so much vertical space but I imagine it must be a challenge when it comes to cleaning and decorating.

The higher the ceiling, the better the air quality. I noticed a difference immediately when I moved from a place with 7.5-foot ceilings to this place which I think has 12-foot ceilings. The air stays ever so much fresher with the higher ceilings.

Is there a board of directors or someone else in charge of the roofers for your housing community? Maybe they could be sounded out about the roofers and how they are doing their job.

Just taking care of everyday nonsense can really drain a person, can't it?

[Prot]

I thought it was the expected thing that work persons cleaned up after doing what they had to do. That having been said, in my experience some are better at cleaning/clearing up than others. I'm not sure how high my ceiling is, but standing on a chair to do anything is not a good experience for me. This may or may not sound unbelievable. Even standing on a set of standard scales can have me swaying and feeling quite unsteady!

[agate]

Standing on a chair is a definite no-no as I understand it--for anyone, not just those who have balance problems. I have a couple of stepstools with very stable handles so I can hang onto something on my way up or down. Somehow the hardest thing is standing on a stepstool and having to reach up for something. My preferred stepstool looks like this:
51bLZyKGteL._AC_SL1500_.jpg

[Prot]

That looks like a good stepstool. My days of standing on chairs are well and truly over. My balance has never been good, and has worsened with age. Ditto coordination. Years ago (1962/3) I was assessed for what used to be the S word. The assessment was at Great Ormond street in London. My parents opted to have me assessed because of things noticed by my 1st school in Bangkok. The result was negative, and alternative possibilities weren't explored. Although never officially assessed, more than a few (mental) health professionals have said I'm quite dyspraxic.

Not doing well with the walking round the flat using the rollator. After about 3 minutes my arms get too heavy and achy, and I have to stop. Will have to try pushing the rollator away from me a bit then walking towards it,then pushing it away from me a bit etc etc. 12 minutes, what I've been managing to do (3mins x 4) is nowhere near enough.

I hope you are both having as good a day as possible.

[agate]

Tim, maybe the rollator needs a bit of adjustment in the handle height? That can make a huge difference.

I'm really dense at times and miss something that is obvious to everybody else, but what is the S word?

About my stepstool: My only issue with it so far has been that it's a trifle heavy and I end up dragging it along over the floor or carpeting, which is slow but in this small place I never have to drag it far.

I have another stepstool that is the more traditional fold-up kind that has two rungs. I don't find standing on the rungs very easy as they are too narrow for my feet, and I always feel wobbly while on it, but I use it for reaching things that are higher up.

[Prot]

The handle height of the rollator has been adjusted. Sp*st*c. The preferred term nowadays is cerebral palsy.

[Virginia]

My days even on step stools are about over. Even if I had one I could hold on to I don't think it would do much good. I can't reach up very much anymore. I just no longer have the balance.

Agate, my living and dining room ceilings are vaulted. I am going to hire someone to come and put the things that go up high back in place. I am going to call the management company and talk to them about the skylight. I might also call the roofing company. I want someone to cone out and look at mine. Too much went on while they were putting it in for it to be right.

Things are pretty bad in my family. I finally put in a call to my brother Eric and it turned out to be a bad thing. He is really getting worse and worse. I know that grief does get worse for a long time before it gets any better, but he is saying things that make no sense. He is having panic attacks. Today he said he was going from one little project to another and then back again. He said he was doing it so that if anything happened to him Grayson's things could go on. He said he was the only one who knew anything about it. I don't know what he is talking about. We had only been on the phone a few minutes when he told me he just couldn't talk to me and we hung up.

In addition my other brother's wife has not been feeling well and has been having nausea. She went for a CT Scan this morning and they notified them right away that she has a cyst on her pancreas. I looked it up and most of them are non-cancerous. They are going to schedule a MRI. Even if it is not cancer something will have to be done because she can't keep on feeling the way she does.

The world is falling apart.

[agate]

Grayson was Eric's son, I think? Eric must be having such a bad time that I hope there are people around him who can be supportive--? If he's shutting down on your attempt at talking to him, it might be hard for others to get through to him as well.

The mind plays weird tricks on us when we're in shock. Maybe some people take refuge temporarily in an unreal world because they just aren't ready for this new reality--it's too unthinkable. I hope that your brother has some help at hand. If you can get through to him, do you think he'd be willing to consult a counselor or even call a crisis line?

I'm so sorry you're having so much distress lately, what with the roofers and now your sister-in-law's illness, coming on top of the shock of Grayson's death. And of course you've very concerned about Eric. Are there other family members who could get through to Eric, maybe just in a friendly way?

There's an old southern custom that doesn't seem to be observed much in other parts of the country, but Eric might even find it helpful if your community does this: When there's a death in someone's family, the neighbors and friends and other relatives bring in covered dishes and other food that they've made (or bought), as a way of showing they care and helping to tide the person over in a difficult time when getting meals may be the last thing that person thinks about. It always seemed to me like a very nice custom though I've heard people criticize it as being invasive. I guess it depends on who the helpful people are.

[Virginia]

Agate, Eric is not ready for a counselor yet. I don't know if he will go later or not. His wife seems to be doing pretty well. She has been at the beach with their daughter and her family all week. She is due back tomorrow. Their oldest son is working in New Jersey for a few weeks then he will be in Delaware and after that in New York.

We are naturally concerned about my other SIL. It is actually two cyst on her pancreas. This is not anything that unusual, but she has had nausea, throwing up and not feeling well. We will see what the MRI shows. I just hope they don't wait several weeks to schedule it.

I discovered I had not thrown the strip of roofing away. I had put it with boxes that I want the cleaning people to take to my recycling can when they come. I am going to keep it. I measured it and it is just over 27 inches long and about 3 1/2 inches wide. So they were cutting on something up there.

About that old Southern tradition you were referencing. There was what they called a "meal train" started almost immediately and continued on until just over a week ago. I had never heard of that. When my husband passed away my neighbors fed everyone at my house the night of visitation. The next day my Sunday School class fed us lunch before the funeral. Many of his relatives were here from Georgia so those two meals really came in good. I don't know about people coming in everyday for almost two weeks.

I did my exercises today. I hope I can do them again tomorrow. I threw in 8 two pound weight lifts. I'll see if I can do that 3 times a week. If I can I will then try to do more. I only did them from my side up to my shoulder. I have never had strong arms. I would like to build them up, but if I do it will take a lot of time.