What's Happenin' (Part 2)

[dawnmn]

We did an outdoor movie awhile ago and invited guest. Had a blast doing it. The bugs weren't so bad.

My new granddaughter was born on the 8th of july, Rosaleen Penelope. Now I have three beautiful granddaughters. There is Arabella and eloise

[tic chick]

hey all!

not a happy camper here today and i need to vent.

so, yesterday, i got a pic in my email. a selfie from one of my best longtime friends of 25+ years. it's a picture of her in the church we both go, her very regularly and me sporadically. she looks very nice, make-up, dressed-up. the note with the pic said, "i was at mass today and i said a prayer for you."

well, thank you very much. i know mass is close to an hour long. it probably takes you a half hour to drive back and forth and i know you socialize after church for a bit and of course getting all dressed up for church takes about half an hour. so, total time about 2 hours 15 minutes. the last time you called...oh, maybe a month ago, you said we would get together the next week because you were babysitting monday thru thursday for your niece, but you would call me monday when you knew what times she would need you. never got the call. sometimes months go by when we don't talk. i understand you visit grandchildren in different states, but i'm sure you're not gone 24/7.

i opened up that i was feeling depressed lately, not really wanting to go out. you know, i have a beautiful garden, i got chairs!!! you don't have to sit on the effing sidewalk! i got wine all the time, cuz you ripped into me one day when i told another girlfriend to come over cuz she still has 2 bottles of her fave beer chilling in my fridge.

that's why i'm skeptical of the christians who go to church every sunday. yeah, i know the basis of sharing your faith with the community. all that means to me is y'all get dressed up and show up so others can see how religious you are. it's a faith cattle call.

and my other friend of 25+ years, the one whose beer is chilling in my fridge. yes, i realize you are busy, too. i always see your pic on facebook with other friends, drinking at some festival, drinking at some sporting event. i'm sorry i'm not a big drinker or smoker, but i can talk with the best of them and be quite charming. yes, i appreciate the spur of the moment call back in may inviting me to a play. it was a busy day for me and i just couldn't shower, do my hair and dress up to go to the theater in time, but i appreciate that you thought of me cuz you had an extra ticket. i dropped off a little present for you about 6 weeks ago. i said, come over. you said you had a wedding to go to the following week, out of town. ok. i assume you're not at the wedding still.

this is another good church going christian.

so, here's all these good christians who have time to go to church for 2 hours every week and no time for a depressed friend. it makes no effing sense to me. i am always here. call.

or drop by any time you're in the area of the church. i'm only 3 blocks away.

i miss you.

thank you fro reading,
jeannie

[houghchrst]

Hi Dawn good to see you. Yes I have considered hosting an adult night and a kids night and a family night. Bugs here are terrible because we are backed onto a pond and the woods so we are all use to it and take precautions. Congratulations on another grandbaby. Such beautiful oldfashioned names. I was just thinking the other day about how so many of the older names have fallen to the wayside.

Good Lord Joy I remember you talking about that mule and for the longest time I thought you meant an actual mule.

Jeannie I am so sorry you are going through it. Depression is a bitch. No one gets it unless they've done the time. I think depression makes people uncomfortable and they just don't know how to talk about it or engage the depressed person. That embarrasses them so they avoid it. Quite frankly I never put much stock into whether a person is supposed to be a good person or know what to do just because they go to church. That is sometimes the only time they are in any way Godly. 'course I know you know that. Doesn't change the affront. I also think that it can be a generational thing. The younger people these days I think understand depression and mental illness more because the world is talking about it more and people are not so ashamed to have to admit to getting help. It is still taboo in some families especially religious families. They don't always get help, they consider it an issue of faith. As though if you were more Godly your affliction would be cured. Dear Lord my son just asked me if a female friend of his could come and stay with us. She needed some psych help and knew it but her parents wouldn't let her as long as she was under their roof, citing religious reasons, so he wanted her to come stay until she could go to boot camp. I don't know why a young lady with mental issues should be allowed to go into the military but that was a big fat no at the time. Now I am thinking.

I truly hope you feel better Jeannie, it is a miserable existence, is it anything in particular? Life in general, Oh God do I got life in general? Meds maybe counseling?

I don't even have but really a handful of female friends and most of them are 'family' through CJ. I find I don't much like females LOLOL. I don't see my princess since my car has been broken down. That hurts me. She is going through a terrible time but I am tired and want to slap some sense into her and spent over a year trying to help her get through her times but she just keeps doing the same old thing so I have run out of ideas. She lives in her own little bubble and it is thinning in areas and ready to pop.



As for me my pain has reached new highs. Hadn't realized how much the Neurontin my psych prescribed me was working on my pain until I ran out. I will be getting it back and be having a discussion with my doctor about my depression and pain and see if I can't get my dosage back up to where it was and start taking it three times a day. I had an abscessed molar about two weeks ago, pain up face and down neck and went to the ER dentist, they wouldn't give me anything for pain, I can no longer take NSAIDS, and they wouldn't pull it then because I am on blood thinners so I have to get okay and now doc wants to see me before he gives the okay and suggested I go to ER clinic and tell them the dentist sent me. They were stumped as to why a doc would send me there. I had to beg but they gave me three Tylenol 3s. LOL i have two left. They are useless. Only for surgery do they prescribe pain meds. Went to my ortho this week and told him how bad my pain was in my knees and that they were constantly grinding and popping. Got injection in each knee. They are excruciating but I am so relieved. Wish that worked with all my joints just no painful injection lol. I suggest they knock me out and just go at it and when I wake I will feel like I have a new body. Gave me a scrip for 20 50mg Tramadol lol. Yeah I have to take two to even get an edge. I have taken one. Those will be for emergencies. Gonna talk to PM doc about back and trigger point injections and see if they help some of my other issues. I can't live like this for the rest of my life. I don't want to. Ortho said next step would be knee replacement but because of my pain history he doesn't think I am a good candidate. Pain most likely will not be relieved. Don't respond well to PT so recovery is iffy. I cannot get out into the yard to work hardly at all right now and my damn mower keeps breaking down. Waiting on a part now. Started mowing and blade engage cable broke. Oh well, story of my life, that mower breaks down every year sometimes more than once but I cannot afford over $1000 for a new one.

Ah yeah I could go on but I won't. I haven't even been blogging lately. Too depressing LOLOL.

[joy]

sorry to see just how bad we all are. but I am in such good company I might add as I thjink dearly of each of you.. I may not be online as often as I once was but now perhaps I can be more often. hubby bought a cheap laptop computer to help daughter with her work. but as usual, her mother-in-law has her own ideals of how to do everything. at least I never had to work for my inlaws.. I chose some jobs that were bad for my spine several times that only added to my severe curved spine etc and I was bad before my idiopathic peripheral neuropathy killed off nerves in feet legs arms hands etc. but yay, I am sitting in a comfortable chair using a laptop for the first time in along time.....

[tic chick]

hey all!

chris...it was just a matter of still being depressed over breaking up with my boyfriend. also my dog, nora, who is 17y/o is having a harder time walking and it hurts me to see her labor so hard to walk. i upped her pain meds a couple dyas ago and she's doing better, but i know she probably won't be here through the winter. i hope she dies in her sleep so i don't have to put her down. my friend finally called and we went out, the one who sent me a pic from church. it's not like she's a stranger to depression. her daughter died 5 years ago from alcoholism and anorexia and i was there for her thru that. she has 4 grands now, 2 in florida and 2 in illinois, her hubby retired and she is working part time, 2 jobs, do get some extra cash. i empathize, but it doesn't make me miss her less. i am back in therapy, but i won't take any antidepressants because i'm already on the benzos for anxiety and that's my major problem. the depression has been on and off since my husband died last year....just got worse this year because of the breakup and stuff.

so, i am posting pics of my garden and how it looks today. i am posting of pic of what it looked like before i started, when my sewer line broke from the house to detroit's mainline. seems like i've been working on it forever, but i'm pretty sure it's only been about 13 years. the cement patio was put in 2013. i have moved plants as the garden has been filled and i am already moving some more because it got so cool here and the plants are at the end of their growing cycle. my son put the wooden arbor up for me last month and i dug up the wisteria vine from the front and it is now being trained to grow around the arbor. the big clump of grass in the middle of the yard will be moved in the spring and the roses will be moved so that they go straight in a row from the bare side of the arbor out. i have done everything in the yard except pour the concrete patio and plant the 3 yews that give shade above the hostas along the fence line. the purple sand leaf cherry in the corner by the house was just a little things 5 years ago. okay, here goes. click on the pic if it's small and i hope it'll enlarge for you in a separate window

garden progress 1.jpg

garden 8272019.jpg

garden 8272019 2.jpg

garden 8272019 3.jpg

garden 8272019 4.jpg

hope you enjoy!

jeannie

[jingle]

Oh, Jeannie -- you've worked soooo hard. Your garden is worth it! How lovely!
I hope your dog does well. Pets mean so much.
My precious cats were born in 2010 so they aren't young but they both are strong and healthy. Thank goodness!

[houghchrst]

Jeannie I think about Nora often and wondered how she was faring since she lost her buddy. I know she is getting up there in years. I am so sorry. So terribly heartbreaking to see someone you love fade. I am glad you and your friend got some time together. Always helps to get out of the house and socialize. Not that i would know LOL. Your yard is amazing. So different when I was there.

Joy I hope to see you soon since you got a new laptop and that you are doing well.

Jingle how are things going your way?



I have been on the Trintillex for about three weeks now. I cannot cry lol. I have moments where I feel like crying but the meds have dummied down my emotions or something. My OCDs are much better and I do not feel so anxious ridden. I do feel a tad edgy, a bit jittery, almost irritable and very cocky. Doc wants to see me in four weeks to see how the side effects are doing and to keep an update on my heart rate. I noticed an absurd increase in appetite. I must watch this because if I gain weight my pain increases.

The Neurontin has been a life saver pain wise. Really takes the edge off and gives me a bit of energy which boosts my mood also. Only problem there is I still pay for any thing that I do, during the day, later. To the point to where it is hard to walk. Was burning some wood out in the firepit in our woods and bent over to pick up some wood and stood and started walking when a head rush over took me and almost dropped me to my knees, I made it to the lawn chair which held me up then plopped my fat butt down into it. Kind of brings the Life Alert to the fore front of one's mind. I feel like my body is abandoning me. Being Traitorous. The only thing that keeps me from achieving goals I want, simple goals, is my body and that makes me so angry.

Am still fostering and had to create a separate FB page for Chris's Fosters because I knew my friends were inundated with posts from me regarding animals and were getting tired of it. So on my regular FB page I am doing less animal posts and keeping everything separate. Only invited a few select friends to both pages.

Time to take a muscle relaxer for my back and have some lunch/leftovers, try and catch up on Supernatural. There are fifteen seasons and I thought I was good from season 10 but lo and behold I recognized very little from season 8 up. So back I go lol. Oh well it is a little guilty pleasure watching those young men all these years. Very entertaining.

[clouds z]

I have been moving back into my living room. Since I bought the Roku near Christmas and it won't work on the tv in the living room I have been spending late afternoons napping, then dinner for us all, then when everyone is fat and happy I go in my room and sit in bed and watch a movie or catch up on a Netflix or Hulu series. Very picky about what I watch. Tell my shortcake goodnight and go to bed and maybe take a couple tokes while I read, have a cigarette then lights out. Sooo the point is that I rigged up Jared's Christmas projector in the living room and hooked my Roku to it so now i have a mini theater in my living room. . Soooooo much cheaper than a new television and even though the light is limited, I think to 10,000 hours, replacing is still much cheaper than a new tv. The screen is so big that I had to fold part of it. I plan to try to put it up outside and do a movie or two maybe with some friends outside. I have the branch for it just outside the patio.

id say get rid of roku and just use a Ethernet cord to wall for internet-i felt terrible with a roku

[tic chick]

hey all!

so, wouldn't you know this meme i saw on fb that said the cool temps a few weeks ago were "false fall" in michigan was right.

of course, i have been in the garden. i dug a hole and put some decorative bricks around it so i could replant my hydrangea that i think is unhappy getting so little sun. i dug up a crimson barberry from my front yard and planted a spirea across the lawn from the other spirea. i bought some clover seed mixed with low growing grasses as an alternative to the weeds that have been my lawn that i keep cut short so it doesn't look like crap. i have zumba tonight, so i am just doing easy stuff like trimming plants so i can move them. when i am happy enough with my front yard (maybe in the spring), i will post a pic of that.

it is getting darker earlier now. by 8pm it's almost dark. it keeps getting dark earlier and earlier faster this time of year. i upped nora's pain meds again, because she's having difficulty again. we're going to the vet this friday to get a blood check on her, just to make sure this one med doesn't cause probs.

so, i am at my favorite fresh fruit and veggie market on saturday and i have to use their bathroom. so, i go in and smell that they must have recently cleaned the floor and there is one of those little, triangular signs out, too. i am in the bathroom 45 seconds and i am just smelling this cleaning solution. i get out of there, open the door and almost faint. i go to the check out line and i am talking out loud to the cashier to check me out quickly because i need air. she is trying to be polite and chat with me, but i don't want to chat i want to get the eff out of there. there are 2 women managers right in front of me. i say to them, that the bathroom cleaning solution is making me sick. then i start having a coughing fit. one of the women gets on the phone and calls some kind of code over the phone, but no one says anything to me...offers to help. i get out of there and it takes me half an hour before i can get the smell of this cleaning solution out of my nose and my lungs and of course, i am on the verge of a panic attack because i feel like i can't breathe right. anyways, like i said, in half an hour i was fine. i do not have any chemical sensitivity or lung probs. i smelled ammonia in the bathroom, but not like any cleaning solution. i am betting somebody who didn't know better mixed bleach and ammonia together, which causes a noxious gas.

so, anyways, i have been feeling in my ptsd mode the past several days. yesterday my son came home unexpectedly, after leaving for his baseball game. i was on the pc and i had the radio turned up pretty loud, but i heard the door opening and i froze. it took me about half a minute to remember nora was in the living room and she would bark if a stranger came in the house (unless she was totally zonked out). so, i call my son's name as i slowly walk through the house with my heavy metal candle holder in my hand. this candleholder is in a zig zag shape, like a bolt of lightning. it's heavy metal, copper colored, it's about a foot high and has all these sharp metal edges. it probably weighs close to a pound, maybe a little over. it looks so pretty, but i know i can inflict major damage with it. i go to the basement doorway and call my son's name. he's in the basement changing clothes, he says. i tell him to please give me a shout out when he comes into the house, especially if i'm not expecting him home. i tell him my ptsd is acting up lately and because i don't know when that will happen, that would he please just announce himself when he comes in. geez. i HATE this! i have to tell my son to say something when he comes in the door...but it's either that or flip out. this is why i don't have a gun, y'all...lol. although, i have thought of getting one. my younger daughter did, but she has a concealed weapon permit and shoots targets weekly.

so, i have to get back in my zen zone. zumba will help tonight. then a couple days of working in the garden. i bought about 5 books from our church bok sale on friday...books by my fave authors. stocking up for winter.

so, i think y'all are probably in a warm spell wherever you are because it's happening everywhere.

jingle and chris, thanks for the nice comments on the yard. you know, a couple weeks ago, i actually indulged myself and sat in my chaise lounge amongst my flowers. i rarely do that because i am constantly working on it. then i go into the yard next door to pick up a few sticks for fire kindling (my neighbor says it's ok for me to go in her yard), and i look at my garden as a whole and i think, wow! that's a nice garden....lol. and when people pass by my house and compliment me on my front yard, it's so nice to hear that i'm doing a good job because i am working so fricking hard.

clouds, i hope you're doing well, also. i didn't get a roku, although i did get a dvd player that plays stuff off netflix and roku and hulu, plus my dvd's.

joy, nice to see you pop in on my fb page and here .

thank you all for sharing and caring,
jeannie

[clouds z]

oh i feel awful,my life sucks i guess

[clouds z]

Only registered and activated users can see links., Click Here To Register... this was good i guess

[joy]

[B]hi all, I am looking forward to fall but not cold weather. I freeze at 72 degrees and cannot move easily at 70. Jeannie you just reminded me of a time years ago when hubby went on his work trips, etc and I was home by myself. there had been a number of breakins around our area so I got a pistol of his out just in case. around 8:15 pm our doorbell rang. I thought it was late for any of our friends to be calling so I got the pistol and held it behind my back and went to answer the door. To my amazement it was a fellow worker of my husbands bringing hubbys paycheck so I could put it in the bank. I was both so relieved and thankful and very grateful as it was so much easier than my having to go get the check.

Even back then I wondered if by my having a gun out that I might just be providing someone with bad intentions with a weapon to use. One of our friends had a son go to college in an area where a lot of things were going on. I listened as my hubby and his friend discussed getting a shotgun, one that has a distinct sound when I guess you pull the handle before you pull the trigger. If whoever broke in had good hearing that might scare them away was their thoughts. makes me wish I could do something like that. we were broken into a few years ago and since neither of us were home they really ransacked our place and had the time to go through everything we had. they were caught the same day after breaking into some more homes.

[houghchrst]

Clouds I am so sorry you are doing awful. I know that you know that watching all that depressing news stuff can affect you negatively. I also know how fear can turn it into an obsession. I went nuts when the Occupy movement came to this country, watched fervently in the other countries while it happened and knew it was coming here and was so into the whole movement that I went a little crazy. I'm not cut out for that kind of work because I absorb the intensity of emotions and the hope like a sponge. I was devastated when it was tamped down, as that is all it has done, it is not gone. Then had to take a step back because I got too involved and got head and heart sick. It was bad. I still cannot read or watch anything with Trump in it. The man makes me physically and mentally ill. I am dreading the next four years because I know this next election is already written in stone based on financial backing. There is no way a woman is going to win and Bernie Sanders is old as dirt though I like him. I would like to see him or Joe Biden win then pick warren as vice LOLOL wouldn't that be a kicker. Okay no politics here.

I have slowly been working on my mower LMAO, as usual. My yard is still a hot mess thank goodness winter is coming lol covers a multitude of sins. May ask neighbor man if he will give me a good once over before winter gets here. Have all the parts to fix it just not working out so well. I am not knowledgeable enough and I am afraid of screwing it up. CJ is still looking for the replacement part for my car. He has to get it from the dealership as soon as he finds some place that may have it. So I am losing my mind stuck in this house.

Not a lot is going on, been able to maintain a somewhat clean house. My walls and baseboards are disgusting, it hasn't been painted or washed since 2007. I would love to paint but because they are so dirty a good coat of Kilz needs to be put on first. I am thinking I may wash walls when I quit smoking. I did it before. May have some trouble with the ladder this time around but I have help here so we will see.

Seems my heart health is a little more complicated than I thought or should say I was told. Nurse foolishly left my chart open on the computer with my diagnoses page open and I got a nice pic and have mucho questions for the cardiologist.

Had my arterial ablation done. They were right when they told me the pain would be minimal during the procedure but they neglected to tell me that the pain would take two to three days to kick in so on the fourth day I was tender and by the next day I could barely walk. Lasted for almost five days. Turds. Making arrangements Friday to schedule the left leg.

Fostering is going the same. Lots of kitties coming through. I have two fosters and my rescue right now so things are going smooth. My feral rehab is going up for adoption soon. I have written her bio and taken the pictures to be posted on Los gatos FB and adoption page. I am going to cry when she goes. Shoot I am crying now and I only just said it. I pray she gets adopted because if she doesn't then I cannot send her to live outside even to a friendly barn. It will break my heart. so the rescue has allowed me to try to adopt her out as she is with an older understanding patient adult.

I hope everyone has a great week, luv and miss you all.

[clouds z]

Only registered and activated users can see links., Click Here To Register... on als

i dont have it

[clouds z]

Only registered and activated users can see links., Click Here To Register... “Antifa” street thug can now look forward to continuing his fight — from jail. David Campbell, 32, copped a plea for his role in a 2018 beatdown outside the Night for Freedom party in Manhattan organized by right-wing activist Mike Cernovich. Campbell pleaded guilty to two counts of felony assault and will be sentenced on Oct. 23 to 18 months in the slammer, reps for Manhattan District Attorney Cy Vance Jr. told The Post. Campbell was arrested near the venue, a nightclub at West 50th Street and 12th Avenue on Jan. 20 2018, after he punched and choked a 56-year-old man he had followed out of the event, police said. He was one of about 80 Antifa agitators protesting the gathering.

this proud boys antifa fight thing is crazy