OT December Chit Chat

[SuzE-Q]

Happy belated bday, Howie! Hope you didn't drink too much and stay up all night partying like it was 1999!!!

[Howie]

Well I didn't drink a drop, but these cats, well, it was a sad sight to even see.

[renee]

Yes, Howie's new car is red.
It's in upstate NY where we are practicing removing ice from the wings.

You are going to LOVE it!

[Howie]

I'm sure I will love it (if it ever gets here) mostly because it's from you!

[Jeanie Z]

:) Hi everyone. I had an email from Cherie and she and David were returning home having driven through the storm up north. She said being with the family was not so stressful as they had been prepared for his death for a long time. Her sister is staying to help her Mom sort things.

My MS group is having their Christmas dinner tonight. Tomorrow both my sons are coming over to put up my Christmas tree. All my cards are sent, and packages mailed. Now all I have left is getting the stocking goodies for all the family.

I hope all of you have wonderful holidays whether you celebrate Christmas or Hanukkah.

We are having our coldest day so far this Winter. We were down to 38 last night. I have central heat and air so I stayed warm. I slept in a sweatshirt. Jeanie:)

[Jo6]

Hi everybody. I have enjoyed sharing December Roll Call for your MS group. A lively bunch you are! You share your Joy as well as Sorrow. I send my condolences to Cherie and family. Both of my parents have passed on to a beautiful place. Although I am happy for them they are not suffering anymore I still miss them.

Now, Happy Birthday to Howie and anyone else that share's a birthday in December. Howie must be special cause I don't see anybody else getting a new car for their birthday. I got a new mini van 4 years ago and have not even been under the wheel. I started having seizure's and the Drs. say no more driving. Even though the Drs. were at fault for the seizure's. Bad Drs.!!

Anyway Christmas is almost here and things usually done this time of the year is still waiting on me to do them. I will enjoy my family and little grand's and sit on my throne and let them wait on me hand and foot.

I want to wish each and every one of you Happy Holiday's. I thank you for letting me share your December Roll Call. I have enjoyed it. May good health and happiness bless all of you.

My love to all, Julia s












8hugs

[Howie]

And the same to you Julia, I hope you have a great holiday season!

[Gary]

Happy belated Birthday Howie! <insert a really cool/interesting/funny graphic here>

Catching up on my rest. And helping decorate our house for Christmas. We have all my MIL decorations now. Oh mmmmyyyyy. Yesterday son and I set up 30 nutcrackers in the living room from 3' to 6" she had decorations for everything from soap dishes for the bathroom to holiday hot pads. We don't have a uncovered table or flat spot in the house. She had several ceramic towns that have light bulbs in them and they are all lit up. And we haven't started with the yard stuff.

There are animated reindeer and trees. My kids and I figured that my wife would want everything set up this year. Both my in laws loved Christmas and had tons of decorations to prove it! After my FIL passed they were never put up again. Good thing everything was carefully packed in boxes and stored in plastic tubs with lids. We used the garage to sort things and lets just say that our 2 cars are parked in the driveway because the garage is full of tubs and boxes. So its all good.

We had the first estate sale and we sold close to half of everything that was displayed. Now we can empty more sheds we just didn't have enough room to set up any more tables. Yeah there is that much stuff. We put prices on items to sell them. Not to get rich. But my philosophy is an item has a price- but make me an offer. If it doesn't sell I have a idea what I will pay and that is what I will pay the estate anything else gets donated to one of the local charities. If they do not want it (they have had to get picky, people "donate" to avoid paying dump fees at the landfill).

It is windy today blowing 38 mph with gusts to 45. But it is 50 deg right now. We are ahead 3/4 of an inch in rainfall. Had a couple days of dense fog where you can see 10' in front of your car. Funny thing here is it is in patches so you drive along and literally hit a wall of fog it may only be a 1/2 mile long but it seems like miles. The school buses have a white strobe light on the roof. My wife says it helps but it doesn't change the fact that most people cant stand getting behind a school bus and they will pass at any cost. And even blow the red light crossings. That carries a fine of $374. But if a cop is not around the bus driver has to get the color, make and license of the car and they have to be able to ID the driver.

My wife testified in one case several years ago and the guy got off because she said the SUV was black and it was dark blue.

Had a long talk with Cherie and her husband Dave as they prepared to drive back home. We spent a long time reminiscing about our parents and in-laws. As usual I reminded her about over doing it but its Cherie, she only has one speed and direction: forward and fast!

Stay warm

[Cherie]

Sorry to be away from all of you for so long but it has been a jam packed couple of weeks. I was last at my parents the first week of November, said my physical goodbyes and figured that would be the last time I would see my dad here. We continued to speak on the phone daily till about a week and a half ago when he began having trouble speaking and spent more time sleeping. By last Monday, he could no longer walk or transfer and Tuesday went into a hospital bed in the living room. Wednesday he woke from a lengthy period of sleep to see several family members and friends around the bed and said, "Looks like it's Crossover Day". He told everyone he was leaving and went back to sleep for 22 hours. He woke at noon on Thursday and was surprised that he was still here because he had been "there" for "quite some time." Mom asked him what it was like. He responded, "The introduction was good. It is the dawning of a new day more lovely than anything you could imagine..." and drifted back to sleep. I had a conference in Boston that I felt I needed to attend on Saturday but planned to go immediately after the conference to Upstate NY. Attended the Friday night event and was there from 7:30 Saturday morning till coffee break when I called my folks and was told he was slipping quickly so we left the conference and made it there around 4:30 in the afternoon. There were more than 30 family and friends in the house and they were playing and singing together.

I took Dad's hand and told him I was here. He smiled and nodded but did not open his eyes. Three hours later after everybody but a couple of sisters had left, I took his hand and said, "Dad, folks have gone home now and it is quiet. Tomorrow is Mom's birthday and she says the best birthday present you could give her would be to go where there is no more pain or sickness. Please know you are free to go when you need to." He croaked out, "I can't leave her" and those were the last words he ever spoke. I told him I understood that was how he felt now but she would be OK and we were all there to make sure of that and he did not have to leave until he was sure that was true. He went deeper and further away throughout the night and by dawn on Sunday was not responsive to anyone or anything except an occasional moan or wince as we repositioned him so we continued to give him his morphine every 4 hours. All Day Sunday (mom's 83rd birthday) she sat and played the keyboard with his favorite music. She was in bed shortly after 7 that night and by 9, Tricia, Jean and I settled in to sit vigil for the night. Jean was asleep on the couch by 10:30 and Tricia and I talked for a couple of hours, she helped me turn him and give him his morphine then she slept a bit.

At three the girls were both awake when the first clock in the room chimed the hour. Tricia said, "Ask not for whom the bell tolls..." and jean responded, "It Tolls for thee.Time to go home Dad." The second clock chimed the hour 30 seconds later and he gasped and went to a deeper place with less effective breathing. Same thing happened at 4 and at 5. We woke mom at 5:45 (she is normally up by 5 and had overslept) and she could see he was close so she went and got dressed and decided to "play him home" and sat at the keyboard for the next hour playing as he had longer and longer periods of apnea (not breathing). Hospice RN and Chaplain were there. Nurse left at 8:30 am as he had stabilized his breathing and the chaplain left at 9. At 9:15 the phone rang and it was Gail, his regular 2-3x/week Hospice nurse asking if she should come this morning or this afternoon. Tricia told her ASAP because he did not have much longer. She was at the door at 9:23. Tricia squeezed Dad's hand and said, "Dad, Gail is here!" and he smiled, gasped and left. By 9:30 I was on the road making the rounds to the Amish to let them know and I had not been back at the house for more than 10 minutes when the first of the buggies started arriving. The funeral director was there taking his body out as the 7th buggy arrived and Dad's best friend in that Community and his wife arrived so they got to say goodbye.

Mother had planned to have a Memorial service in the Spring when the weather broke so no one would be put at risk trying to make it there in a Lake effect storm. However, this morning, my sister called to say that they were having a Memorial Service this Saturday at 3. We cannot make it back for that and 11 of his grand children cannot make it but she needs closure and needs to put this behind her and figure out who she is without him. They would have been married 63 years on January 4th. There is so much she has been unable to do in the 2.5 years since he got quite ill and she became his full time caregiver.

Thank you all for your support and condolences.

And Happy birthday Howie

[Howie]

Cherie, I'm crying from reading your post. It was so like my dad's passing. Perhaps they have already met. Thank you for the birthday wishes.

[Frog42]

Cherie, I got tears in my eyes reading your story. I hope it brought you some closure.

[Howie]

It's 13 days until Christmas! Better get that shopping done!

[SalpalSally]

i'm just not sweating it, this year..lol

[Howie]

As long as you got me something.

[Virginia]

Cherie, thanks for thinking of us at this time, and letting us know how your Dad crossed over. There is still the grieving to be done, but you and your family are strong and will be able to see this through.

Sally, I like that you are just not sweating it. I am a little, but would not be if someone would tell me a generic gift I could get for about $25.00 to $30.00. I have bought one for so many years I have run out of ideas. Do not want to do a gift card again.